Hacknet – List of IRC logs

Hacknet – List of IRC logs 1 - steamlists.com
Hacknet – List of IRC logs 1 - steamlists.com

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List of IRC logs that i can find

The logs (in no particular order)


<erno> hm, i’ve lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I can’t figure out where in my apartment it is.

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks?

<TheXPhial> vacuums

<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense?

<TheXPhial> black holes

<Guo_Si> Hey, you know what just isn’t cool?

<TheXPhial> lava?

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<DeadMansHand> haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk

<DeadMansHand> we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first

<DeadMansHand> took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out

<DeadMansHand> i looked around for pete and he must’ve chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh

<DeadMansHand> What’d he say when he woke up this morning?

<Thirteen-> uhh.. he hasn’t come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you?

<DeadMansHand> holy ♥♥♥♥.

<DeadMansHand> i ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hope im wrong about what im thinking right now

<DeadMansHand> im ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ going back to the beach to make sure

<DeadMansHand> if he gets home call me, i don’t want to be worrying about this

<Thirteen-> will do. you better hope he’s not still buried, you’ll be in deep ♥♥♥♥.

quit: (DeadMansHand)

<Tyran> wtf? pete came home last night you ♥♥♥♥, Ken’s going to be worrying about this ♥♥♥♥ all day

<Thirteen-> haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts

join: (PeteRepeat) ([email protected])

<PeteRepeat> ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ken

<PeteRepeat> ken… that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot

<quiqssilver> pete, ken didn’t come back last night, i thought he was still with you.

<PeteRepeat> oh ♥♥♥♥.

<PeteRepeat> if ken shows up, make sure he doesn’t know im at the beach digging for his body. don’t want to make him think i care or anything.

quit: (PeteRepeat)

<Thirteen-> rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach.

<Tyran> i can’t believe how perfect their timing was

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<Sui88> 67% of guys are stupid

<V-dude> i belong with the other 13%

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<NHBoy> I broke my G-string while fingering a minor 🙁

<rycool> …

<NHBoy> I was trying to play Knocking on Heaven’s door.

<NHBoy> Oh well, time to buy new strings.

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?

BritneySpears14: Aight.

bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.

BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.

bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.

BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.

bloodninja: Me too baby.

BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.

bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.

BritneySpears14: Hey…

bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.

BritneySpears14: Funny I still don’t see it.

bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.

BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.

bloodninja: Don’t f*ck with me ♥♥♥♥♥, I’m the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.

bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.

BritneySpears14: Don’t ever message me again you piece of ****.

bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.

bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik’s evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.

bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it’s getting hard now.

bloodninja: Baby?


BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?

eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I’m ready.

BritneySpears14: I like your music Em… Tee hee.

eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.

BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.

BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.

eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.

BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.

eminemBNJA: Oh ****

BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I’m gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie p*rn you f*ck up.

eminemBNJA: Oh ****

eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<by> Is there anyway I can tell the world I’m an idiot?

<Seven7> Of course, just type your name, where you live and your confession

<by> Kk

<by> I am Mark Duval of Belgium, and I am an idiot

<by> ?

<by> Now what?

<Seven7> Don’t worry. It’s done

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<wolf> 1. Save every Free Credit Card Offer you get, Put it in pile A

<wolf> 2. Save every Free Coupon You get, put that in pile B

<wolf> 3. Now open the credit card mail from pile A and find the Business

Reply Mail Envelope.

<wolf> 4. Take the coupons from pile B and stuff them in the envelope you hold

in your hand.

<wolf> 5. Drop the stuffed to the brim envelopes in your mail and walk away


<wolf> I have now received two phone calls from the credit card companies

telling me that they received a stuffed envelope with coupons rather

then my application. They informed me that it they are not pleased that

they footed the bill for the crap I sent them. I reply with “It says

Business Reply Mail” I’m suggesting coupons to you to ensure that your

business is more successful. They promptly hang up on me.

<wolf> Now, I did this for about a month before it got boring, so I got an

added idea! I added exactly 33 cents worth of pennies to the envelope

so they paid EXTRA due to the weight. I got a call informing me about

the money, I said it was a mistake and I demanded my change back. After

yelling at the clerk and then to the supervisor they agreed to my

demands and cut me a check for the money. I hold in my hand at this

very moment a check from GTE Visa for exactly 33 cents.

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]



<_kr4m3r> so many ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ criminals, its ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

<foniks`> heh, if we sent all the criminals to some empty continent and just left them there to die

<foniks`> and showed up like 50yrs later like, “sup?”

<foniks`> whatd u think they’d say?

<FoSZoR[bg]> something along the lines of, “G`Day mate”

Archived Via : http://bash.org – [bash.org]

I hit the character limit so here


<frank> can you help me install GTA3?

<knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren’t using

frank has quit IRC. (Quit)

<knightmare> …

Archived Via : http://Bash.org – [Bash.org]



<cassius_clay13> so I was with my friend bryan the other night in a bar

<cassius_clay13> well he got really drunk and said he was gonna puke

<cassius_clay13> so i helped him walk to the toilet

<cassius_clay13> all the stalls were occupied

<emoti_conartist> lol

<cassius_clay13> bryan is a rugby player… so a big guy

<cassius_clay13> so he ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ KICKS one of the stall doors open

<cassius_clay13> and there’s this guy in there taking a ♥♥♥♥

<emoti_conartist> hahahahahaha

<cassius_clay13> and bryan throws up ALL OVER HIM

<cassius_clay13> then (this is genius) bryan thinks ‘oh ♥♥♥♥… if i were taking a ♥♥♥♥ and someone came in and was sick all over me, i’d want to ♥♥♥♥ him up… so i’d better hit him first’

<cassius_clay13> so he ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ SMACKS this guy in the face

<cassius_clay13> and runs away

<cassius_clay13> imagine being that guy… WORST NIGHT OUT EVER

Archived Via : http://Bash.org – [Bash.org]



<Patrician|Away> what does your robot do, sam

<bovril> it collects data about the surrounding environment, then discards it and drives into walls

Archived Via : http://Bash.org – [Bash.org]



<anamexis> oh man

<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right

–> Beefpile ([email protected]) – []  has joined #themacmind

<anamexis> and it exploded

<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard

<anamexis> but I got it away just in time

<– Beefpile has quit (sick ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥)

<anamexis> :<

Archived Via : http://Bash.org – [Bash.org]



I probably missed some, so help me expand this

also apparent bash is a real site you can search it up on google or click the links in the log

This guide gets worked on when i feel like it

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